Gwen's Corner

Frank – Beau
Janet – Halo
Brad – Saturn
Riff – Nuggett
Maggie – Emily
Columbia – Amy
Dr. Scott – Starman
Rocky- Sean
Eddie – Cody
Crimmie – Mike
Transies – Ashley, Britt, Christy, Cory, Eris, Fish, JJ, Justin, KC, Kirk, Katie, Mary, Megan, Nikcola, Pete
Techies – Paul, Walker, Donna, Sean, Cody, Kirk, Mike, Ray, and Danny
Floorwalkers- Jason, Starman, Cody, Wes

ALL-CON 2009! How I love thee, let me count the ways. We started out with an hour long Pre-Show where we once again got to perform Men in Tights and Cell Block Tango, and lots of other fun dancy things. We had to do the Read a Book thing again because it is awesome. Jason had an audience member dance off game for the Virgin Game, which was more fun than it should have been. The guy that got the MOST screwed in this situation was the one who had to “dance” to the Crash Test Dummies “Mmm Mmmm Mmmm Mmmm” song, which quite possibly is the worst song ever written. The guy who won danced to a techno version of Tetris, which was well deserved because he did the Russian kickline thing. We had lots of audience members onstage dancing, in various stages of dress or non-dress. All I am gonna say is, if you wear a short skirt, you need to shave your bush, ha. Everyone saw that, lol...underwear is your friend, sometimes. My Army of Transies were very colorful, Katie in particular, with Cody and her doing some rap dance off song thing. It was funny.

I was distracted as hell, as always, but still got to see a very loud Opening Dance, a missing glasses Brad for Dammit Janet, and a creepy Riff during There’s a Light. Thankfully I missed Beau and his nastiness for Sweet T, but I hear that he did very well. For those of you who haven’t ever seen the show, you must know that Beau abuses the hell out of some of us so whatever abuse he gets on here is more than worth it. Wes didn’t get his fair share of abuse this time because Sean was Rocky. He was covered (and I do mean COVERED) in gold glitter because Amy filled the Rocky oil container up quite well. Halo went to play with the Lesbians instead of with Sean, and many sharp heels were caught in the gaft taped stage. There was glitter all over the stage, ha. No one got hurt this time, which was a miracle. No one bitched to me about boobs being shown either, which is also a miracle.
Floorshow was actually pretty great, except for the heels being stuck and for Beau, in general. No one should have to see him onstage, gross…especially in those panties…like a trainwreck, ugh. But in general there were no major issues which was fantastic! They cleaned everything else up super-fast and headed off to cause trouble….
And then there was the Bastard Party. Never in my LIFE has ANY CROWD sucked punch down that fast. Dear GOD, they drank it all in like 20 minutes. I was like CRAP!!! They don’t realize how strong that stuff is, lol. Next time there will be unflavored cheaper alcohol instead of the most expensive stuff I can find, lol. I also will be getting a keg again even though they never ever drink it, but it will still be easier than dishing out beers. Experimental, doesn’t always work. I also wondered where the heck everyone was, I couldn’t find half the people I was looking for Friday. (Where were you my Dirty Trooper???? I missed you!) But Brian was there and I love him so it was ok. There were lots of fun times to be had, Sean almost punched someone who was very rude (we all wanted to punch him), and then there was lots of bean dip consumed. I believe that they enjoyed the Twinkies the best (thanks Mary, that was screwed up but REALLY funny), and we also got some compliments on the fruit snacks, lol. Next year I will know that the windows DO open, and we will be able to open them so we can keep the door shut.
The rest of the con was fantastic, as always. Miss Star Wars is always fun to watch. I missed the vacuum weapon and armor demo, which made me sad, but I am hoping that I will get to watch it next year. There were some REALLY awesome costumes this year, namely and most impressive to me were the three OLD-school Transformer costumes and the Iron Man costume. Wow, talk about neat! I really loved them. Katie came to visit and we were really happy to see her. JJ placed in the Costume Contest for her AWESOME steampunk costume, which had little locks all over it and was really shiny and pretty. There was the Austin Browncoats (Serenity) table which I of course had to buy stuff from (I got a Jayne shirt and a Malcolm Reynolds shirt) and of course stuff from Amy and Halo. I won a free ticket to Scarbie (yay!) and will be going to see that soon enough. I also drank a lot of Tequila on Saturday night and ate a whole bag of Natural Cheddar Cheetos, which, in retrospect, was not the most wise of decisions. But it was fun while it lasted. We had 2 RHPS panels, one on Friday (Experience and Etiquette) and on Saturday (Costume Panel). Both went well from my understanding. We tried to bring out lots of examples so that they knew what to expect and how to build costumes (duh, I know, just like the titles, right). I finally got to see the full Burlesque show on Saturday, and it was so fun! I had never seen a full one, only pieces. It brings me to the point that it is not a lot different than what we do for the show, or the Trixies anyway. I will be bringing more of this element to the show if at all possible. I also decided that I need to Trixie much more than I do. (Coincidentally I bought 2 fantastic Trixie hats that I will be sporting soon.) There was one performer that I was really impressed with, her name was Mariah, and she was awesome! My favorite routine of hers was when she went from U.S. Officer to Wonder Woman, it was fantastic! Also the fire routine and the cop and robber routine were pretty freakin happening. I really enjoyed the show.

In general I really just enjoy All-Con and it is the GREATEST vacation a girl can have. I am so grateful to Todd and Tamara and Brian and Chris and Jeff and EVERYONE that helped us out this year and every year at All-Con, you all pot on such an awesome con and the Bastards and I enjoy it so very much!
Next year the Bastards hope to be even more involved on Con levels and help with Volunteering and all that jazz. There will be more details about that as soon as we figure it out. In the meantime, thanks so much for and to all of you who have come to support us and the convention and continue to support the convention itself. It truly is one of the best around!
Cheers!
Madame Leah