Gwen's Corner

Hi all, man has it really been a month since the last show report? Well, yes, beacuse it's been a month since the last show.

(Note: if you are reading this in the future, LB parted ways with the Ridgmar Movie Tavern, and at the time of this writing, were homeless)

However, we'd already planned on splitting our gargantuan cast in twain so we could visit Austin's Queerios (www.austinrocky.org), our sister cast, and perform with them. But since the rest of us were now left with a gaping hole in our Saturday night, a lot of us decided to make the trip too! As best as I can remember it, here's the lineup:

Frank: Britt
Janet: Rachel
Brad: (Queerio)
Riff Raff: Gus
Columbia: Lyndi
Magenta: Emily (Queerio)
Rocky: Renn (Queerio)
Eddie: Shawn (Queerio)
Dr. Scott: Pete
Criminologist: Pengwan (Queerio)
Transies: A fuckton of people from both casts
Floorwalkers: A slightly smaller fuckton of people from both casts

Thanks to Queerios and the Alamo Drafthouse for their hospitality, as always. Also thanks to some of our Losbians who drove down to see us play, as well as the rest of the sold out Austin crowd who got to see a hell of a performance.

Our weekend, however, started early as a lot of us came down Friday night and partied with the Queerios as only Rocky people can...by killing our emotions with booze! Afterwards, we woke up at the crack of noon and got some food and did some shopping for hipster clothing. I, on the other hand, left Saturday afternoon at a reasonable time and caught the flu, possibly while standing outside in the rain eating a taco at a sketchy looking truck across the highway from the Czech Stop. Good decisions...what do those two words mean?

So Saturday night came...okay, before the show, a few of us saw Patton Oswalt at the Paramount and it was FUCKING AWESOME. I just wanted to rub that in. SUCK IT!!!

Okay, so now Saturday night came for reals. The audience was already lined up outside the theater by the time we got there (just like home!), and we set up our stuff and did a quick run-through of some of the blocking. Some of the cast came down to watch, rather than perform, because our full cast plus Queerios cast would have spanned the width of two theaters. Seriously...lot of fucking people there.

So the Queerios have a way different preshow than we do. First off, they show awesome videos while the audience is coming in (something I'd like to do once we find a new home, if you have any requests), then Shawn does this great call and response preshow that they've been doing for years. It's great to hear the cast and their regulars yelling along to it, although I do enjoy our rules. They also get all of their virgins up to sacrifice (which they had a shit ton of, wow), with simulated butt-fucking for all! That having been taken care of, the movie itself started.

Oh yeah, Megaaaan was there! We miss her ever since she moved back to Austin, but our loss is Queerios gain...which is fair, since they had her first before she moved up to our part of town. We will get her back eventually though, mark our words!!1

So yeah, instead of our Opening Dance, they have Trixies doing Science Fiction Double Feature, and they brought out the big guns for our visit. Five set of big guns, that is. Boobs. By guns, I mean boobs. Five girls in lingerie, who then stripped down to panties and duct tape. Colored duct tape, so when they were standing next to each other, it was like a game of Rock Band that you can masturbate to. By the time the blood came back to my head, some asshole and some slut were doing some good times lesbian shit on stage. I guess gay marriage is legal in Austin, of all places. It's like a little blue bubble in the middle of Red Texas.

The great thing about doing shows with other casts: It's still the same goddamn movie, so it's not all that tricky to interact with new actors. Time Warp was a little cramped, but no one got hurt (much). This is around the time that the flu started to take effect, so I don't remember much. I remember titties. And Pengwan in a Hannibal Lecter mask, a kilt, a gas mask, duct tape, and OH GOD HE WAS IN PANTIES. Ok, I'm going to try and forget this now. Why does his crotch always try and make its way into my face? Whyyyyyyyyy!!!

So that was our show! Then we went to Jim's for food, which isn't Ol' South, but does serve food, so it is good. Most of us went to bed, except me, who decided that driving home at 4am was an awesome idea. When it was raining. While sick. And tired. But hey, Czech Stop, right?

And that was our Queer Bastards show. Check out the pictures, and check out the Queerios whenever you're in Austin. They've been at the Drafthouse for SIX FUCKING YEARS!!!

As for us, we'll find a home soon (or if you're in the future, our new theater is awesome and buys us candy), so keep checking here or Facebook for the latest news!!!