Gwen's Corner

Typewriter: "fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck"

If someone can tell me which movie this is from, I will give you a free special friend. NO CHEATING, DONNA!!! You know the answer to this already. :P

For those of you who like special friends, I am happy to inform people that I am going to start selling my demented stuffed animals. For more information, please see me before the next show you can make and I will show you my selection. ;) yeah, baby.

So, this week Madame Leah told me I am doing show report. I didn't get a chance to take notes like I wanted because I had no pen, but I will try to remember it as well as possible.
Lemme see....

It started with dancing and tits... especially my tits. lol it's on the dvd, I just know it. You bastards should buy one so you can take my tits home with you. Oh, and that reminds me, we're recording pretty much everything that happens during the preshow, so nobody whine that you didn't know that already because I just told you! :P nah nah nah nah boo-boo! And virgin games with pure shannon with an unexpected game that animal somehow thought she would cooperate in. Know this, people.... Shannon is PURE... and I mean that in a serious way that's not really at all that amusing when Animal asks her to fake an orgasm, especially when she adds Starman Matt to the equation. I think Shannon's brain exploded and came out of her eyes while she was moaning a deep emotionally scarring cry into the microphone. Poor Shannon! But she's got the best DSL's around! *dodges incoming objects*
~For those of you who are still unclear as to what DSL stands for, please see Shannon before, after or during the show and ask her. She will not give you a demonstration but she might punch you or cry.

Onto things that make Shannon happy, and the rest of us highly amused, we had a Harry Potter look-alike in the theatre! And we pulled him up on stage with his counterpart, the Malfoy look-alike. (All this time I was thinking "FAN-FIC!!!")

They told us that they had special underwear on that night, and that aspired us to pull their pants down and see just what they meant. Our eyes met with fishnets.

So, not like having Harry Potter and Malfoy onstage with their pants down wearing fishnet pantyhose was enough, we made them hold hands while two of our bastards man-handled thier "wands" and made them do the "start your engines game."

Needless to say, despite all rumors being rumors, we can officially claim the truth to the one about Malfoy being a little on the "poofy" side. Yeah, he got a chubs. It was great. (LOL)

Then we pulled the girl virgins and they faked tickling each other and it was just sad so we told them to sit the fuck down again. Faking ain't faking unless it's realistic faking if you have to fake it at all. I'm confused now.
MOVING ON!

The show itself... in my head is cloudy. See? This is why my reports are so....... nyah. I need notes or I forget it all.
*sigh*

I have the line-up, but just cause I could copy and paste it from Leah's notes. If you need to know who-played-what, then here ya go:

Lineup:
Frank- English
Janet- Katie
Brad- Danny
Riff- Glenn
Maggie- Angie
Columbia- Star
Dr. Scott- Starman
Rocky- Cody
Eddie- Preston
Crim- Shannon
Spot A- Paul
Spot B- Emily
Board- Leah
Grip- Cody, Preston, Glenn
Floorwalkers- Animal, Glenn, Preston, Daniel
Transies- Amy, Eris, Mike, Wes, Squid, Greg, Halo, Manda, Marc, Isaac, Josh, Charlie, Brooke, Bizah, Limey

I can tell you all what I do remember though:

I remember Bobcat's hairy asscrack running down the aisle while pushing Starman in the wheelchair to the stage and his reaction from the audience being priceless. He told me afterwards:
"It was great. First the top row of people groaned and went 'Awr!!' and then the next row of people turned around to see what the first row groaned about then I passed them and they went 'Awr!!' and it went on like dominos all the way down."

I remember Katie grabbing pure shannon's crotch and making her scream in surprise. I giggled.
Speaking of Katie...
she has a special sound byte now. It's her giggling and saying "I like tires." I'll bet you were all very confused. I'll let you in on it.
One day while we were all goofing off at rehearsal outside the theatre, Robert comes with his truck and in the bed of the trunk was a monster truck tire. A BIG TIRE, right?
Well, sometimes Leah grants us play time after we do some rehearsing because we're good little bastards and we pleased our madame. Katie and Amanda both wanted to roll around in it down the little hill that is the parking lot. Amanda went on down first and fell out of the tire halfway down the hill. Katie went down backwards, bruised up her leg, had her hair caught on something and as she put it, "ate the tire" all the way down the hill. Then the tire stopped and fell over and she got out, giggled and said "I like tires." During this whole experience, someone was video taping it... I think it was either minion or english, I can't remember which and it was probably stumbled upon recently and used during the show to embarasse Katie.
We all had a great laugh.

I also remember tank scene/lesbian scene. Animal scared away Star by chasing her to the front of the theatre and into the lobby. I remember hearing her hitting him and screaming out his name in vane. Then I saw people kind of disappear after I don't know who got into the tank and started humping Corey/Cody and Katie whacked him in the nuts and vanished herself, and then there goes Angie, running backstage during her scene and all were very confused indeed.

NOW REMINDERS ARE IMPORTANT SO MAKE SURE YOU READ THIS BECAUSE THERE ARE TITS INVOLVED... AND LESBIANS!

You thought I was joking?
The upcoming show and dates are:

**The FuckValentine'sAllGirlLesbianExtravaganza Show!
Yes, you read that right. All girl show = no boys on stage = lesbian action galore. Yes, still $4.00 a ticket, but don't forget to bring an extra dollar so you can go buy a raffle ticket to gain one of many chances to go up onstage and have the lesbains play with you!
This show will be next Saturday, February 10th. DON'T MISS IT!!!

ALSO:

**The Mardi-Gras show! There will be beads, there will be tits, there will be jestures and cajun music, and all your favorite bastards playing around in mardi gras masks. This show will be on Saturday, February 24th. Fun times, my friends.