Gwen's Corner

It's that time of the week again, folks. Time for the quick run through of what happened 
last weekend during our show that is... 

DUN DUN DUNNNNNNN!!! 

The Rocky Horror Picture Show! 

This is also that time of year again, folks. That's right! Conventions! Transylvanian 
Conventions, that is. I know some of you may have noticed a shortage of Transylvanians and 
some actors... like myself playing a role that they haven't played in around TWO years! 
That's because about more than half the cast were in Chicago for the CHRAP (Chicagoland 
Rocky Horror Area Performers) 2006 Convention! All of their information and pictures can be 
found  Right HERE (IF you're interested anyway. (I googled it 
(*wink*)) 

We miss them a lot this weekend but we still had a blast. And what a night!!! WE HAD OVER 
140 PEOPLE LAST NIGHT! ON A REGULAR PERFORMANCE NIGHT, TOO!!! We were very excited. I would 
bet all you readers would like to know what happened on our end of this shindig, eh? Could 
you ask nicely? Could you hug your screen and tell it sweet nothings? (^_^) Okies! 
This is what happened in a nutshell: 

We had one microphone and we were pleased about that... except when Starman thought it 
essential to sing the "DOO's" for the waiting song famous by the game show Jeopardy. For 
those of you who were there, I stood infront of one of the speakers to dullen the shrilling 
sound of Starman trying to sing... and I'm not sorry about it, damn it!!! For those of you 
who weren't there, you SUCK and I mean that in a neutral way! And I'm not sorry about that 
one either!!! (>_<) 

VIRGIN GAMES were a lot of fun... for the audience anyway. The easiest Virgin Game EVER, and 
for some reason the one that the virgins usually can't even TRY and make amusing: Fake the 
Orgasm. There were four girls, so Shannon thought it would be easy for them. Girls fake 
orgasms... get it? I thought you should! If you didn't see that one coming, then I don't 
know what's wrong with you. 

Then after we finished playing with our audience members, we started the movie. (YAY!!!) 

This is how it went... from my perspective. 

FRANK was played by STAR. Aw, my starry Star. Her Frank vest sparkles and it's laced up the 
front but there's a gap where the inbetween space of her boobs are. (I hope you sluts can 
use your imagination atleast because you missed out, suckas!) Hotness. That's all I can 
think of when Star plays Frank. This weekend she was a good sport. A very very good sport. 
And she had a whip in one of those special situations... you'll know when I tell you later. 
One thing everyone should know about Star is that she likes whips. She likes to whip them 
and whip them good. For all you pervs out there, or if you're one of those LEEK morons, I am 
not spelling "wipe". (Just thought I'd clarify that) 

JANET was played by me, AMY. Yes, I was serious about not playing it in TWO years and I 
haven't practiced the part since, so if you're an avid anal-retentive viewer and spotted all 
of my mistakes, then I appologise. It was kind of like reflexes up there because I played 
that part so much. Anyway, I curled my hair and it kept! I was suprised in a good way! Yay! 
Give me cookies!!! 

BRAD was played by FRED. I was happy about that. I mean, I love Randall and all, but he 
doesn't remember to remind me of upcoming scenes, and Fred is so damn colorful. You should 
all come back when we have the sound system (which is currently in Chicago or solitary locked 
confinement somewhere, I don't know which) and watch him dance before the show starts. Hell, 
watch him dance AFTER the show starts. He's amusing and you'll see why later. 

RIFF was played by BEAU. Didn't see that one coming, did yah? I don't know how lonog it's 
been since he's played that part, but I do know that he always puts his special "touch" on 
everything he plays. (Yeah that's right, I said it... but be careful when you get close to 
him, he's a breeder...) Beau scares me sometimes and has no trouble offending the "others" on 
cast as he calls them. (I think he means EVERYONE) Remember that thing that I said Star was a 
good sport about? At the end of the movie, Riff has a laser. Nope. This time he had a pointy 
white hood, a handing noose and three back-ups doing the nazi march and salute behind him. 
For those of you who don't know much about Beau, it's that he's brave in stupid situations 
and loves to distract people while their in their roles. (Star is half black. Get it?) 

MAGENTA was played by ANGIE. Goth Angie, not JJ with huge juggs. Angie always looks pissed 
off and that's just perfect for Magenta. She's got a plastic shiney Magenta dress and it 
looks freaking AWESOME on her. Just so you all know, she doesn't much like talking with 
people she doesn't know and REALLY HATES getting hugs from people she doesn't know. I guess 
all I'm saying is, she has a razor necklace and she enjoys using it. (hehehe slashy slashy!) 
She didn't have a "night robe" that she usually wears for when Magenta is in that see thru 
number, so she borrowed my ultra shiney disco ball dress for it instead. Like she said, "I'll 
bet people will look at me in this thing and think - what the fuck??" 

COLUMBIA was played by KATE. She is a good Columbia. I mean, being it the only other thing 
she plays, she's just GOT to be good at it, y'know? She's got shiney everything and I'm 
jealous of her shorts. I need some of those. NOTE TO ALL VIRGINS: If you absolutely refuse to 
take the ceremonial markings, she will pulverise you. There was the random guy this week and 
it was heard from her as she was dragging him to the back of the theatre (to punish him, I 
think) "You just crossed the biggest bitch ever!" 

DR. SCOTT was played by DANIEL.... wait, that's not what happened. It was played by GAY MIKE 
because Daniel's a diabetic and wasn't feeling well enough to just sit in a wheel chair. BUT 
he was well enough to march down the aisle behind Beau with a pointy hood... Hmmm... I wonder 
about that boy sometimes. But (insert heroic music here________) GAY MIKE TO THE RESCUE! 
WHOOOOSH! And yes, fellas, he is gay. He likes long walks and candle lit dinners too. So give 
him a butt squeeze and tell him that he's loved cause he doesn't really get any. (I love 
you!!) 

ROCKY was played by ENGLISH. He behaved well in the tank. Pat him on the head next time you 
see him and tell him he was a good boy. He even "took it" from Charles (up the butt, in the 
mouth, whatever Charles dished out... BUT NEVER GO ASS TO MOUTH, it's unforgiveable) Yes, the 
Kevin Smith jokes are still here. Talking about tank scene, I got out and joined the lesbians. 
(*giggle*) I totally forgot about the lesbian ticket raffle and I accidently scared everyone 
by rushing in. Sorry folks. Congrats, guy! 

EDDIE was played by the BEST guy to play Eddie EVER,...... PRESTON! I wonder if he ever gets 
tired of lifting girls vertically into the air every weekend. Maybe it's a workout for him, 
but it amazes me every time. This time I had a blond moment. While Preston was rolling around 
on the ground with Kate, he tied her feet together, then stood up and grabbed his motorcycle. 
Kate untied her feet then Preston shouted "SHE'S LOOSE!" and all the Transies ran like every 
weekend. For some reason she was mad about something he did and she was happy that Star anihalated him. 

CRIMMIE was played by CRISTY. Cristy is an awesome Criminologist although I didn't get to see 
her perform any of her parts because while the story's being unraveled by the guy with no 
neck, it's a costume change and I do those backstage where I can't see SQUAT! But I believe 
that she did well because the people who usually "distract" the actors were in Chicago. 
Namely Animal and Minion. You should all give Cristy cookies when you see her next. 


The crazy, fun, party animal TRANSYLVANIANS were played by: 
Mr. Saturn, Charles, Greg, Halo, Emily, Nathan and Shannon. 

Technical support and Security were: 
Mr. Pizat, Sean, Preston, Danny, English and Robert. 

Floorwalkers: 
Starman Matt, English and Preston 

Well, I hope you all enjoyed my play-by-play analysis. Next time maybe you should attend! 
It's only $4.00 a ticket, starts at Midnight every Saturday (If you didn't know this by now, 
you should come just so we can point and laugh at you. Nah, seriously, it's fun.) 

ANNOUNCEMENT: 
DRAG SHOW COMING SOON! 
THIS LINE-UP WILL DISTURB AND INTRIGUE YOU! 
STAY TUNED FOR FURTHER UPDATES!!! 

That is all. 
And remember, sex and violence with whips and chains isn't for everyone, but for those who 
can pull off the vinyl look. 

Love, 
Amy