Gwen's Corner

Hello to all you sluts out there.  This week, I, Eris, have brought you the 
show report to amuse and entertain you.  Madame Leah was gracious enough to 
allow me to sit in the audience this week (the first time in LONG time) and 
watch the show, so that I could keep track of the goings on.  Due to that 
privilege, I took notes, so hopefully, I haven't missed anything.


Let me see, where to begin.  Well, we got into the theater, and I was happy, 
very happy, as music was pounding out of the speakers, and my legs just kept 
telling me to dance.  SO I did, as did much of our audience.  It makes me 
happy to see you all out in the crowd, moving to the beat.  For one of the 
final songs played, Animal had cast members drag Starman up on the box, we 
all danced to Barbie Girl.  Now, Starman used to have a boss who would play 
that song every hour, so, needless to say, he hates it with a passion.  And 
our Animal was so kind to exploit that fact.  After that, he played the 
Macarena, and I, personally, am glad that he has learned to use the fade option 
n that, as opposed to making us dance to it for what seems like 10 minutes.  Now...

"Ladies and Gentlemen, Heteros and Homos, Welcome to The Rocky Horror Picture Show"

Pre-show officially begins.

Now, I have come to learn, before the show, someone took the liberty to introduce 
my boyfriend to Animal.  At this point, he had the spots center on him, and 
proceeded to tell the audience that he was responsible for lowering to cast 
virgin count.  All this as I turn ten shades of red.  And, actually, I am again 
now dammit.

And we start with, The Rules.  So on and so forth, the Pre-show continued, until 
someone decided, at "women may throw panties, provided they are clean," to throw 
two thongs onto Animal and Starman.  One was black and, I think, red.  And the 
other was red; and both were very large, or at least they seemed to be from my 
angle.  Animal decided to put the black one on over his pants.  It was a very 
disturbing sight.

Hmm, I think I will jump to the Virgin Contest.  First up, the boys.  One of 
them was in a skirt, it was funny.  Next, Animal pulled another audience member 
up on the box.  This one was the mother of our beloved Glenn.  She got the treat 
of starting the boys' engines.  One of them won, don't remember which, and we 
moved on to the girls.  These girls were here on their first stop for Spring 
Break.  They were up from San Antonio, and stayed with me for a couple of days.  
They are friends with my best friend and she REALLY wanted them chosen, so up 
on the box they went.  The bra race ensued and, ta-da, one of them won.  Animal 
was amazed by the loser's bra, and the push-up part was shaped like hands.  
I must say, I was intrigued by the idea, and surprised I have not seen it before.  
And off went the girl, after the English, trying to retrieve her bra.

Moving on, the show starts.
Lineup was:
Frank - Beau
Janet - Limey
Brad - Fred
Riff - Glenn
Magenta - JJ
Columbia - Amy
Dr. Scott - Minion
Rocky - English
Eddie - Preston
Crimmie - Charles

Transies - Bizah, Cory, Marc, Ammanda, Cristy, Pob, Squid, Shannon, Emily, Greg, 
Katie, Brittanie, Jennifer, and Daniel

A long, long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, God said, Let there be Lips.  
And the lights come up, and there is Bizah, over on the left, putting her jacket
on inside out.  And then you pan over to the right, and there is Pob, wearing the 
red thong from pre-show over his pants, with a purple stuffed animal stuffed in it.  
Where do these boys come up with it?  I just don't see.  But on we go.

Let's see, there's a wedding, and a couple of smurfs die.  The asshole proposes 
to the slut, they sniff glue, and it's on to the neckless wonder.  Only this week, 
the neckless wonder was also the pantless wonder.  Our Charles did the entire movie 
in the vest, tie, and boxers.  So the tie is climbed, the chin is fucked, and we 
are in for a strange journey that we will remember for a very long time.

So the asshole and slut are driving along, they take the wrong fork, the tire blows 
out, he grads her boob and they head to the castle.  The incestuous handyman and 
domestic bring them in and they do the time warp with the groupie and Transylvanians.  
On to our favorite transvestite, Frank.  At the end of Sweet T, while at the elevator,
 Beau is standing there, being all Frankish, and out comes this hand from his crotch.  
I am not sure who was back there, but the crotch hand was singing along with Frank

Now everyone goes up to the lab and we all listen to Frank talk.  Or at least, 
we pretend to.  I was watching our Transies.  Cory gave Fred a wedgie, his face 
was funny.  And when Frank says he found the spark that is the breath of life, 
all the transies are mesmerized by there hands and the spark motion.  If you watch, 
you can see them do it to, as they are continually amazed by the sparking of hands 
at every show.

For the unveiling of the tank, we had both a short Columbia, and a short Maggie, 
so they were jumping to get the fabric over the tank ladders.  Two girls jumping... 
I know what you boys are thinking, and some of the girls too.  For creation scene,
 Animal played the jazzy version of Down with the Sickness again.  Frank went over 
and sang into the mike, and the transies did a kickline.

A hot English guy in gold underwear pops out of the tank, and Frank chases him 
around the theater.  Honestly, I would chase him around the theater too.  Our 
English is fun the scratch.

One to Make You a Man.  Animal moved the light so that is shown right onto 
English's crotch, and he kept making faces like it was too hot.  When Columbia 
pushes Rocky onto the floor to do pushups, Robert was down there, in a skirt, 
and when Animal pounced on... it was a bastard boy threesome, not as common and 
the bastard girl threesomes, but that is later. Once English fought his way free, 
he popped and said "help me" with this adorable pouty face, just as Frank grabbed 
him and the get broken apart by Eddie storming out of the freezer.

Now, Eddie is out and he starts singing, the transies get all energetic and dance 
around, and Columbia is all over Eddie.  She kept pulling on him, but he pulled 
right back, and she actually fell over a couple of times.  Then for the lift, 
they just couldn't get up, but third times a charm and up she went, legs in the air.

Frank gets pissed, kills Eddie.  Columbia gets pissed, screams a lot (won't she 
ever shut up?).  Frank sings again, and Rocky shakes his ass, at least ours did, 
it was nice to watch.

As usual, during bedroom scene, Animal kept poking Beau's ass.  At the end of 
the blue room scene, Fred leaped off the box.  It makes you wonder how many 
times he's been caught on his knees.

When Janet went to see what was in the little box, she had a little tantrum 
when she saw Brad.  Limey was cute, stomping and crying.  Then she found the 
monster, out monsterful English.  Going into the tank with him is fun, much fun.  
But this time, just as she started singing to him, more boys crept in.  Animal 
snapped open Limey's bra, so she spent her first verse trying to hook it back 
up.  Animal jumped on English and Limey left to join the Lesbians over on the 
box.  It looked like the three of them were having a good time over there when 
the boys decided to move over there too, so the girls ran to the tank, just in 
time for the scene to end (then they get to play when no one's watching).

Frank beats Riff, Dr. Scott comes in, and Janet and Rocky are discovered.  
This week our Brits were covered by their flag.  Next is dinner, another slice 
anyone?  Lots of singing, the hand jive is going on, then the note is read.  
Off come the table cloth and Janet rus to Rocky.  Throw the monster, slap the 
bitch, and we're off.  Janet's in the lead, around the corner and up the stairs.  
Frank catches her, but a well placed knee puts her back on top, through the hole 
and down in the lab.  She was in the running to win until rank engaged the transducer.  
No mater what she tried, she just couldn't move her tacky white shoes.

Statue time.  Maggie is pissed, but Frank can't seem to get her attention.  He 
kept snapping at her, but alas, our Maggie knew her stuff and didn't turn until 
screen Maggie did.

Floorshow is fun.  People dancing across the stage in their underwear.  Frank 
comes out and sings, but Animal always has other plans. This week, he was "mopping" 
up front to look less threatening.  I don't think Animal will ever not look 
threatening, ever.  So at clung to her thigh, Animal, yet again, clung to Frank's thigh.

On we go.  The brother and sister come back and crash the party.  They kill 
Frank and Rocky and Columbia, and send the rest home, only to be lost in time and space.

The show was awesome and much fun.  If you missed it, well shame on you, you 
must make it up to us.  You should come see us at All-con.

Yes, that is right, the All-con show is this Friday.  Come out and support your 
Bastards.  We have an hour long pre-show with lovely extras.  These things you 
just don't want to miss.  We have links up on the sight for the info and all, 
and we hope to see you all there.

Til next time sluts.